Taking Time for You
Taking Time for You
“Self-care isn’t selfish.” You may have seen or heard this phrase. What do you think about it?
There are so many demands on individuals in today’s world. Many people are employees or students. Others are parents or caregivers, possibly in addition to the role of employee or student outside of their home. Formally or informally, people are also parts of neighborhoods, communities, societies, religious or cultural systems, all with their own expectations.
In each system where a person plays a role, there are unique demands on that person. The compounding of many roles and responsibilities can take a toll, especially when there are conflicting needs at play. At the heart of everything is the individual who must strive for their own mental and physical well-being in order to continue on.
Sometimes it can seem impossible to make time to care for ourselves, especially when we have responsibilities to someone else. But when we keep going without making time for ourselves, we will eventually burn out.
Therapy is, of course, a great avenue to take care of our minds and emotions. Finding a sounding board in a therapist can help in so many ways. A great therapist can point out qualities that you didn’t realize you had and successes you may not realize you’ve achieved, increasing your self-confidence. A therapist can also offer reassurance when you need it, and encouragement in meeting your goals. Setting aside just one hour a week to meet with a therapist can clear away mental frustrations and give you a positive reset for the days ahead.
Therapists can also assist in improving your positive self-talk and your self-awareness. These factors play into self-care when it comes to giving ourselves “permission” to rest or take considered actions. Therapy sessions can be a practice setting to rehearse listening to our bodies, reflecting on emotions, and saying yes to our own needs.
There can be so many conflicting messages in society. “Self-care isn’t selfish” may be a mantra, but other messages may emphasize the need to honor commitments to others above hopes for oneself, or prioritize another relationship above the one you have with yourself. A therapist will help to gently remind you that you can do no good for others if you are unable to give yourself the care you need first. We will talk with you about what you would like to have more of in your life, and how you can work toward having that. It may involve practicing setting boundaries. It may involve setting goals to increase or decrease certain behaviors. It may also involve talking about why some self-care has not been accessible for you, how you feel about that, and what aspects of the situation are within your control. The fact is that we don’t live in an ideal world and sometimes there are limits to what we can do in a practical sense. Often we need to vent about this reality. Sometimes having someone to hear and validate your frustration can help get through the day.
A great therapist will listen to your hopes and dreams. They will then help you funnel those down into the finer details of your daily life, helping you discover what powers you have to create small changes that ripple out into your future. Making time for rest, hydration, nutrition, play and social interaction will pay off as you tackle this process of moving forward. You can discover what aspects of life most feed your body and soul, and start working toward a plan to have more of those available for you. A great therapist will celebrate alongside you when you take the time out to do these things for yourself. There is only one you, and it’s so important to put your needs first as often as you can!
